Ways To Be A Better Person

Ways To Be A Better Person

How To Be A Better Person

How To Be A Better PersonLife is all about choices, everyday we are presented with choices, what to eat, what to wear, what to say etc.   Some of these choices affect only us but many affect those around us greatly. There is no one way to live life, if there was there would be no point in living it.  The beauty of life is that we get to live it how we want and that right there is the biggest choice we are faced with.  It’s all the little choices we make that determines how we are living our life, our perceived reality and the reality that we choose to live.

Though this planet is shared by millions, no two people will ever share the same lives, not even a married couple shares the same lives, every person must make their own choices and their own realities and the truth is that many people are unhappy with the life they have chosen.  For those looking for how to be a better person, incorporate the following attitudes and perspectives into your daily decision making and you’ll feel better about the life you are creating and the contributions you’re making to this world as well.

 

Appreciation

If you are reading this, then you should be appreciative.  First off you are alive, you have healthy vision, you can read, you have a computer which means you have electricity, meaning you most likely have a roof over your head.  Life is a gift, if you woke up today, and have the ability to see and smell, and walk and talk, take a second to appreciate that.  Don’t just say to yourself I’m thankful to be alive, feel the appreciation, feel fortunate that you aren’t worse off, no matter how bad your current situation is.

We all take being alive for granted, if you take just a few moments a week to think about if you were to die today what unfinished business, accomplishments and regrets you would leave behind, it quickly puts you in a state of appreciation for life.  If you cannot appreciate the fact that you are alive and free, then you are never going to fully enjoy life for what it is.  Of everything I talk about in this article, nothing is as important than feeling appreciation for being alive.  This is the single most significant thing one can do in their quest to be a better person, for once you are appreciative it changes your perspective and opens doors you never thought possible.  Don’t believe me?  Keep reading.

 

Don’t take life so seriously

Almost everyone needs to lighten up a bit, though life is really all we have and you should be appreciative for it, it really isn’t all that serious as individuals make it out to be.  I say this in regards to how the media and society defines what is a successful in life and what isn’t.  Truly I believe that happiness is really all that matters in defining whether or not you are succeeding at life, as long you are happy and not causing harm to anyone else or thing, then you are successful.

People take life so serious sometimes.  In doing so, they place restrictions on themselves that make them feel down or unsuccessful.  Perhaps you’re in your thirties and feel like a loser because you aren’t married with a family.  Or maybe you don’t have a high paying job and a fancy new car to prove it.  These are all things that society has defined as being necessary to be considered successful or worthy.  What if I told you that all these things don’t matter.

We are all going to die one day, this much is certain, and when we do nothing we did in our lives will matter.  So do you really want to spend a major portion of your life worrying about appearing successful to society or do you want to live for yourself and truly enjoy life for what it is.  It won’t matter when you’re dead what car you drove, how big your house was, what you looked like and who you knew, so stop making yourself feel bad for not being the most “successful” person you know and start being appreciative for what you do have, life.  One thing I like to do when I’m feeling overwhelmed by life is think about how insignificant we are in relation to the universe.  We are literally on a planet floating around in outer space, in the middle of nowhere.  Think about that, we’re in outer space, does anything really matter?

This little exercise helps me put in perspective just how little my problems and insecurities are.   Now I’m not suggesting you take this too far and think oh my life is insignificant I shouldn’t worry about making the most out of it, care about my health, or how my actions affect myself and others.  You should always be striving to make the most out of life, be the best person you can be, strive to own the fancy possessions you desire, but just don’t place so much weight on determining your self worth and success through what I like to call these “societal judgments”.  In other words, relax don’t take life so seriously.

 

Lead by example, do the right thing

If everyone chose to lead by example through their actions and always strove to do the right thing, imagine the kind of world we would live in.  I think we would see a lot more kindness and appreciation for others contrary to what we have now, which is a society made up of untrusting and selfish individuals who can’t stand to share the same air as others.  To lead by example means to act how we would want others to act in a similar situation.  Doing the right thing means making an informed decision based on how it will affect you, those around you and choosing the correct choice so that the least amount of individuals are affected negatively.

Everyday we are given the opportunity to lead by example.  My favorite way of doing this is by defying stereotypes.  Every race, gender, age, weight etc. has stereotypes that are associated with it.  These stereotypes are huge contributors to the stress we as a society put on each other (as outlined in the above section).  Through our actions we all have the opportunity to break down or contribute to these stereotypes, but if your actions are coming from a place of striving to do the right thing, well then you are 99% percent of the time going to have a positive affect to that given stereotype.  We all know when we are making the right decision vs a wrong decision.  It’s a feeling in our gut that every person possesses.

To lead by example simply treat others as you would like to be treated.  Treat the world how you would like to see this world be.  Treat people with respect and courtesy, don’t put people down, what do you gain from making someone else feel like crap.  There are a plethora of opportunities everyday to do the right thing and lead by example.  Little things like holding the door open for someone, saying hello to stranger, reminding someone that they forgot their ATM card in the ATM machine or just giving someone a compliment.  Think of everything that you did today and ask yourself if you did the right thing, if you didn’t make sure that tomorrow you do.  If everyone took this approach to life, there would be no need for an article on how to be a better person.

 

 Don’t be a victim

It’s so easy for people to make excuses for why their life is the way it is, to be a victim and to feel sorry for themselves.  Well sorry you have to hear this from me, but tough shit, life isn’t fair, quit pouting about it.  No doubt about it bad things happen to good people, tragedies are a part of life and though sorrow and grief are sometimes a necessary healing component, feeling sorry for yourself for the life you’ve created is just you being a weak person.  No one else is responsible for the life you have, no one.  Your abusive father isn’t the reason you’re unhappy with your life, your cheating wife, you’re asshole boss, none of these are reasons to blame for your current situation.  We all create and attract the lives that we are currently living and until you realize that and take responsibility for your life you’ll have a hard time creating a better one.

If you’ve realized you’ve been a victim lately or even your whole, give yourself a pat on the back for this is the first step in breaking out of this pattern.  Many people go through life complaining and feeling victimized, that bad things just happen to them and they just accept that this is how their life is.  This is because it is much more comfortable for some people to feel down than it is to take responsibility and fight for the life they want. Too many people are worried about failing, so they never try to succeed or be happy.  They’d much rather feel sorry for themselves and expect others to do the same.  I don’t know about you but this seems like a horrible way to live, and certainly is not for me.

A good way to jump start your way out of this way of living is to go back to the first technique of this article on appreciation.  Nobody who is feeling they are a victim to life can possibly feel any appreciation for living.  Once you begin to find things to be appreciative for you begin to break out of this victimized state of mind, which opens the flood gates to the many positive things you never allowed yourself to even dream of.  Don’t be scared of failing to reach your goals, failure is a necessary step in realizing what you don’t want in life and provides necessary contrast to the feeling of achievement.  True failure is never attempting to achieve in the first place.  It’s ok to fail at something as long as you never quit trying to achieve your goals.

It’s important to note that if you are beginning your transformation from being a victim to being a creator that it won’t happen overnight.  The ego portion of the mind is much more comfortable in a negative state and can put up a hell of a fight when trying to be stripped of those negative emotions.  Whenever you find yourself slipping back into victim mode, pat yourself on the back for recognizing it, shoot your ego a smile and find something to feel good about.  The trick is feeling, when you are feeling good about something you are emitting positive energy which attracts positive outcomes.  Find anything to feel good about and feel good as often as you can remember.  It can be something as simple as feeling good that you are armed with this knowledge of how not be be a victim and how to be better at life.

 

Be passionate, resist fear

Passion and appreciation are perhaps the two most powerful emotions that one can emit.  The law of attraction states that we attract the vibrations that we put out, vibrations of passion and appreciation are very powerful in creating a better life.  Far too many people live life by the book.  For most people life is a script that we must follow but that is what has been deemed as acceptable.  Most people will go to college, get a job, get married, have kids, get divorced, get sick and then die.  It’s been ingrained in us that this is what life is and many people just accept it and live it with no questions asked.  However this is not how I choose to live and this is not how you are gonna choose to live either.  What I’m wondering is, where is all the passion?

Passion is such a strong and enjoyable emotion, yet it seems to be lacking from so many lives of the people I come in contact with that are looking for how to be better at life.  Without passion you are missing the feeling of being alive, which restricts your feelings of appreciation and positive vibrations.  We must do the things that we are passionate about to truly be enjoying our lives, otherwise what’s the point of living.  Passion is what drives us to be better, to succeed, to influence, to make the right choices, to lead by example.

So many people take the safe and secure road to life, out of fear.  It’s a passionless decision to live life by the book.  To get a 9 to 5 job you don’t like just because it’s secure and that’s what you’re supposed to do.  To get married because you’re afraid of being alone, to have kids because you don’t know who is going to take care of you when you’re old.  These are all fear based decisions that lack passion.

I encourage you to really think about what you are passionate about and think about how you can incorporate that into your daily life.  For most of us this will be finding a way to make our job something we are passionate about.  It doesn’t matter if the job has never been done before or it isn’t a high paying job, if you’re doing what you are passionate about then you are living a high quality of life something that far outweighs a higher paycheck.  Creativity, joy, drive and self-worth are all directly related to passion.  Find what you are passionate about, incorporate that into your daily life, appreciate that you’ve done so and watch the transformation as you’ve uncovered the major steps in how to be a better person.

If you found this article beneficial or interesting, share it below, much appreciated and best of health.

 

3 Responses to “Ways To Be A Better Person”

  1. Sandra Y says:

    Benjamin, Wow, love the comment about us being in outerspace, really put things in perspective for me, felt immediate release of tension when I read that. Cheers.

  2. Lance says:

    Benjamin,

    Great article as always, think you nailed a couple of points here, especially about appreciation and passion. We are always looking ahead to the future and the past but never taking a moment to be thankful for the present. Loving your site, keep up the good work.

  3. Benjamin says:

    Thanks for the comments, @Lance, in regards to appreciating the moment, everyday I like to find little things that I am appreciative for, simple things like the fact my car started or that I have health benefits.

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